Live Love Matter: October 2010

**November is National Adoption Month. With Recycle Love putting on an Orphan Sunday event on November 14th, we thought we'd start a series of adoption spotlights. The idea is to hear about different families and their thoughts, feelings, experiences, and different stages of the journey to their child. Our hope is to raise enough awareness, feed a passion for orphans, or spark enough curiosity that people will come to the event. For those who aren't close enough to come to the event, hopefully it will still start them on some sort of journey because their hearts have been stirred.**_________________________________________________________________________ ~Adoption Spotlight: Lara~

~What led you to decide on adoption? What role did your faith play in that process? Where are you in your adoption journey? Adoption was something that my husband and I always thought would be neat to do "someday." We talked about it from the time we were dating. For us, it made sense that there are children who do not have parents and we are parents who want children, therefore, we can fulfill a need while doing something we want to do anyway (i.e. having children.) Our faith played a huge role in our process. Without our faith in God, we probably never would have taken the leap and begun the adoption. Faith is how we knew God would provide for us to bring our child home, even when it seemed mathematically impossible. We are currently a waiting family, meaning our paperwork is complete and we are now waiting to be matched with a child.
~Did the fact that there is an orphan crisis have anything to do with deciding? Yes. The orphan crisis became something we could not, as Christians, ignore any longer.
~How long did you think/pray about it before actually starting the process? We initially discussed adoption 7 years before beginning the process. At that time, it was discussed in very far-off terms. Through the years, it would periodically come up but we always felt like we would just never be able to afford to adopt. About 7 months before beginning the process, we decided we were going to begin. At that time we started saving and praying to prepare ourselves.
~If you were to give one thing of advice to someone *thinking* about adopting, what would it be? My advice would be to know that adoption is fulfilling a need, but be wary of the "rescuer" mentality. Your adopted child should have the same right to someday hate you as your biological children. I would just say to make sure that you are prepared to parent a child who has been through trauma. Don't expect them to spend their lives thanking you for adopting them, just as you wouldn't expect a biological child to spend their life thanking you for carrying them and giving birth to them.
~If you were to give one thing of advice to someone who just started the process, what would it be? Be patient. Adoption is a marathon, not a sprint. Don't take it personally when people make rude comments or just don't understand your motivation to adopt.

~What has been the most beneficial book, class, blog, or website to you in the journey? Our adoption agency has a listserv (Yahoo group.) Being able to get to know the other families has been an enormous blessing. Our agency is really like a family that rejoices together and carries each other through difficult times. To read more about Lara and her family and their adoption, go check out the family blog at The Farmer's Wife Tells All. If you are interested in seeing the fabulous t-shirts they have designed and are selling to help them go get their child, go HERE. They would make wonderful Christmas presents! Give a gift that serves a purpose!