Adoption Spotlight......Starkey Family

Meet the next family in my series of Adoption Spotlights. I first stumbled upon the Starkey Family blog when they were in the process of getting their homestudy done, and have been following along ever since!  Here is what April had to say.......

~What led you decide on adoption? What role did your faith play in that process?

We had known since before we were married (we had dated since we were 15) that we wanted a family and could not wait to have children. We got pregnant a month and a half after being married and were delighted and even got to see Jeremiah's precious heart beat but right before heading into the second trimester we miscarried. We went on to have three more miscarriages and go through multiple doctors, tests, months of waiting for the next 4 1/2 years. We finally found out from a doctor in Chicago why I kept miscarrying but at the same time God started working on our hearts. We started praying that He would change our desires to match His desires for our lives. That is when He started laying adoption STRONGLY on our hearts. So we spent time praying and researching about it and finally made a decision weeks before the end of 2009 and decided to officially begin our journey on January 1st, 2010. Our faith had the BIGGEST role in our journey because we decided that we wanted God's plan for our family and gave it and surrended it completely to Him. It was VERY hard and I remember the day, I remember the tears as I gave it over to Him and said here Lord, even if it means me never having children, I want your plan for my life. God knew all along the plans He had for us and for Isaac and because of His amazing plans, we are now united as a family and give God all the glory for orchestrating it all out. In the beginning of the journey He gave us a verse that carried us through the whole way and He proved it to us time and time again...Ephesians 3:20!

~Did the fact that there is an orphan crisis have anything to do with deciding?

A little bit. It didn't make the beginning/first decision for us as only God working in our hearts did that but after we said Yes to adoption and started the journey, we found out more and more about the orphans, how many there are and from there on until this day God has not stopped breaking our hearts for the orphans.

~How long did you "contemplate" it before actually starting the process?

I would say a few months and then when we really started praying about it, probably weeks to a month or so!

~If you were to give one thing of advice to someone *thinking* about adopting, what would it be?

Don't hesitate, don't wonder if this is something you should do or not and don't worry about the finances because there are over 147 million orphans in the world and if God has laid them on your heart it's for a reason. If His plans are for you to adopt then He will provide. When we started our journey we had NO money and had to come up with $27-$30,000 and God did it all. First we got a $13,500 grant, second we had amazing fundraizers and support from our friends and family, third friends of ours lended us the $10,000 we needed to get on the waiting list so we didnt have to get a loan and have interest and told us we didnt have to pay them back until we get the adoption tax refund back and fourth another person who we had never met sent us a check for $600 to cover the attorney fees we needed to finalize Isaac's adoption. God definitely did what Ephesians 3:20 says!

~If you were to give one thing of advice to someone who has just started the process, what would it be?

Cling to God, ask for a verse from Him to carry you through, seek out other adoptive families to walk the journey with, start a journal or blog to share your thoughts and feelings as you go through the journey and know that the waiting will be long sometimes but OH SO WORTH IT!

~What else would you like to share?

I feel like I love Isaac more than if he would have came from my womb...that is how special, how great the love that we have for him because of Gods plans to put Isaac in our family. Isaac was going to be aborted, that was his birthmom's original plan but God has greater plans for Isaac and they included life and we feel so blessed and are so grateful to God for choosing us to be Isaac's parents!